An Invitation to a Conversation

April 9, 2000, Fifth Sunday in Lent

A sermon by Rev. Dr. John K. Luoma

Sin can basically be described as living out of an attitude of resentment or having a hard heart. That's what John and Paula Sandford contend in their book The Transformation of the Inner Man. Often an attitude of resentment sets in early in life because of things that are done to us. They give the example of a young woman who came to them for counseling because she was unable to carry a male child. Several times she had miscarried at the third or fourth month. Doctors could find no physical cause, and she desperately wanted to give her husband a son. After much counseling she began to talk about her brother who was quite vicious to her growing up. He continually hurt her and embarrassed her, and her mom and dad failed to protect her. Finally, she remembered one particular day when her brother was especially cruel. As she walked along the river, she hurled stones into the water and vowed again and again: "I will never carry a boy child. I will never carry a boy child!" Though the conscious mind had almost forgotten that vow, the inner being had not. Only as she talked about her brother and that vow and sought God's guidance and forgiveness was she able to have the child she wanted.

The Sandfords also talk about a second way that sin takes root in our hearts. They call it having a heart of stone. Here they talk about numerous episodes in which infants and children are mistreated or abandoned by their parents. Here they talk about people who are hurt in relationships and vow that they will never make themselves vulnerable again. Hardening their hearts protects them from being hurt, but it also means that they will not receive the love that they need.

How do we overcome resentment, and how do we soften the hard heart? The answer is that we can't do it. On our own we are lost. Only Jesus can do it. Only as we enter into a conversation with Jesus is our resentment overcome and our hearts softened. In a little magazine called Sharing Judy Lester Miller shares a story of how resentment and hardness of heart was healed in her life.. She humorously entitles is, "Healed with Donuts."

She says that it all began because her son's car was being fixed, so she had to take him to work every morning. That meant that every day she had to drive by the place where her husband had received his radiation treatments for cancer. Every day she drove by her anger increased because she remembered two doctors there that she felt had been regularly insensitive to her husband.

This was in stark contrast to the rest of the people who cared for him. God had done wonderful things through the others who had ministered to him physically and spiritually. Because of their ministry her husband accepted Christ and was baptized. He had changed and become a new person. Because of this she had pushed down the anger she held against these two doctors, but it came alive again each time she drove by.

Each time she drove by she also felt that the Lord was revealing her true feelings to her. Feelings she had repressed. This is the image that came to mind each time she went by: she saw her hand holding an icicle and stabbing it into the heart of these doctors again and again. She was shocked by the ferocity of her feelings and immediately asked the Lord to forgive her and to help her forgive them. Every morning she drove by she would pray for them and tell the Lord that she forgave them.

One day she read about a person undergoing radiation treatments who would periodically bring cream cheese and bagels as a gift to the radiology technicians. Just at that moment she heard a voice say to her, "You could do that." She says she knew that the voice was the voice of the Lord because the action was an action totally beneficial to the recipient and the opposite of what she wanted to do. "Nuh Uh," she responded.

She let the suggestion lay in her mind for awhile. The next day the Lord nudged her again. "You could bring donuts today.. You have more time this morning.." She responded, "But I don't even know where there is a donut shop on this side of town and besides the office isn't open yet."

"Turn left on Cedar," she heard in her mind. "And then what?" she said. "Then, turn right immediately."

So, she did and sure enough there was a donut shop. She said, "You must really want me to do this Lord." When she looked up and saw the name of the donut shop she had to laugh. It was her name. It read: "Judy's Donuts."

She bought the donuts. Found an employees entrance to the radiation center and brought them in. Then she went back to her car and cried.

She says that now when she drives by there is no more resentment. No more tugs at her heart. The Lord has healed her, and he even knows where donut shops are!

I find this story a wonderful illustration of what Jesus asks his followers to do. He says that the grain of wheat must die if it is going to bear fruit. Likewise, we must die to our resentment and hardness of heart if we are going to be healed and bear the fruits of love. But where do we get the strength to do this? By regularly entering into fellowship with Jesus. And how does this happen? We can talk about a three-legged stool. Each of these legs is necessary if we want to receive the maximum power Jesus wants to give us.

The first leg is private devotions, i.e. personal prayer and Bible study. Is that part of your life? It needs to be. Every day we need to bring our lives before Jesus in that way. One hundred per cent of us should be using the Daily Texts and bringing our lives before God in terms of the TRIP acronym. If we don't use that resource then we should find one that is helpful to us. Now, we can say I'm too busy. I don't have time to do that. But, really, we need to ask the question this way: since the world is at work every day to separate us from Jesus, do we have the time not to do it?

The second leg of the stool is participation in some small group where we can talk about our struggles in daily life and get the support and insights of Christian brothers and sisters as we try to be a follower of Jesus. Do you belong to such a group? My guess is that most of us do not. Once again, we can say, "I don't have the time. But given the world we live in and the evil that is at work, do we have the time not to?

The third leg of the stool is worship. In Holy Communion we receive the only medicine that can heal people as sick as we are. In healing prayer we receive the opportunity to personally share what afflicts us and offer that up to God. In confession we have the opportunity to dump the load of sin that afflicts us. Once again we can say that we don't have the time. But do we have the time to deal with the collapse of relationships that happens through resentment and hardness of heart that inevitably comes when we live our lives apart from the grace of God?

One of the most powerful stories in the history of the Olympic games involved a canoeing specialist named Bill Havens. He was a shoe-in to win a gold medal in the 1924 Olympics in Paris. But a few months before the games began he learned that his wife would likely give birth to their child while he was away. She told him that she could make it on her own . But he refused. He surprised everyone by staying at home. It was a milestone that he didn't want to miss. Though he wondered what might have been, he never regretted his decision.

Well, he poured his life into his son and shared with him his love of the rapids. Twenty-four years later who would you guess won an Olympic medal in Helsinki, Finland? The day after the competition his son, Bill, sent this telegram:

"Dear dad, thanks for waiting around for me to be born in 1924. I'm coming home with the gold medal you should have won." It was signed, "your loving son, Frank."

Many would think Bill Havens decision stupid. But there are priorities in life. One of them is family. But an even higher priority is our relationship with God. We ought not to neglect it.

Copyright 2000 by Rev. Dr. John K. Luoma

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